Thesis:

How do daughters bargain with the patriarchy, when in conflict or care with their mothers in diverse cultural and globalised contexts?

A sociological inquiry into how the patriarchy is present in mother-daughter relationships based on empirical analysis of 15 daughters around the globe.

Abstract

What initially started as inspiration for a book titled “How to love our mothers” has turned into an academic effort from my encounters with women from diverse cultural contexts during the Global Studies Programme (GSP). This thesis delves into a sociological exploration, focused on understanding our need to recognize specific ways in which systems of domination are maintained - in this case, the patriarchy. It examines closely how the patriarchy is embedded in mother daughter relationships through the reinforcement of gender roles, expectations, and power dynamics through intergenerational cycles. The conceptual frameworks of the patriarchal bargain (Kandiyoti, 1988) and love as a political act (hooks, 1952-2021) are closely critiqued and applied through an analysis of how power relations between mother and daughter are defined and maintained. In doing so, this thesis aims to highlight the structural sociological dimensions embedded in the shared experiences of these daughters through a situational analysis lens (Clarke, 2005) and a feminist methodological approach while also acknowledging the influences of neoliberal economic practices at play. A closer look at how globalisation processes have led to changing family dynamics where patriarchal norms are reconfigured aim to connect everyday gendered practices to persistent global patterns of gender power relations (Ackerley and True, 2006). Yet, this work does not seek to universalize the experiences of the daughters interviewed but to describe their nuance and lived reality in terms of how we (myself included) engage with the patriarchy. A strong degree of reflexivity has been exercised in the production of this thesis while imbuing living relationality with research which leads me to view this very thesis as kin (Tynan, 2020). Through interviews with 15 women from diverse nationalities, including myself and my mother, this research aims to highlight daughters' perspectives on their bargaining power with both their mothers and the broader patriarchal system.

Key words:

Daughter, mother, love, bargain, patriarchy, power, globalisation, gender, family, relationality

Table of contents

  • As a daughter who chose to move to different continents away from her family in an effort to “emancipate” herself from her home environment in Singapore, this essay seeks to amplify the voice of daughters across diverse global contexts by scrutinising our role in conflict and care contexts with our mothers. This is aimed at advocating for deeper understanding and a radical ethic of love (hooks, 1994) while unveiling the structural power relations conditioned by the patriarchy that are inconspicuously ingrained in mother-daughter relationships.

  • This literature review critically examines relevant academic work on mother-daughter dynamics, focusing on daughter’s perspectives and an emphasis on addressing the knowledge gap of how daughters navigate conflict with their mothers across global contexts by contributing to the discourse through a non-western feminist perspective that is my own.

  • a. Patriarchal bargain

    b. Love as a political act

    c. Power

  • a. Situational analysis

    b. Thesis as kin

  • a. Conflict and distance

    b. Exercising authority

    c. Expectations & empathy

  • a. Preserving power

    b. Exercising authority

    c. Possibility of death

  • a. Communication and silence

    b. Creativity and courage

    c. Collective care

  • In conclusion, daughters express love for their mothers through a myriad of ways, influenced by their unique experiences and relationships. This thesis, especially given its title of how daughters bargain with the patriarchy functions as a site of recoding women’s agency (Mahmood, 2021). Acts of love can include open communication, understanding, and empathy. Daughters may also demonstrate love by navigating conflicts, negotiating boundaries, and embracing the lessons learned from their mothers.

POETRY

  • Patience, Berlin, March 2024

  • Feel, Berlin, June 2024

  • This week’s wrestle, Berlin, May 2024

Currently, I’m documenting my writing process on my Substack.

Subscribe if you wanna.